Skip to main content

Superhero Zoom Meeting

This was a sketch I submitted to Series 24 Epsiode 1 of Newsjack. I like the premise, but I appreciate it probably needed a few more laughs and the end was pretty weak. Anyway, go easy on it! Apologies once again for any formatting issues. It is copied straight from the Word template.


Smart materials: From tiny robots to colour-swapping clothes

Imagine concrete bridges that can heal cracks without human intervention, or tiny machines that can be injected into the body to treat disease. These are just two applications for a category of ‘animate smart materials’ that change and adapt to their environment that, according to a new report, have the potential to transform the way we live. Personally, until they can develop something that automatically changes what I’m eating depending on what I’m watching then I’m not that impressed. It seems however there those with some deep concerns over the potential of these smart materials…        

 

SUPERHERO ZOOM MEETING

 

FX:                              ZOOM/ONLINE MEETING RINGING

SPIDER-MAN:         Thanks for joining me. I trust you all read the report I sent? So, is anyone else worried about these so-called ‘smart materials.’ Could it mean we’re going to become less useful? Yes, Wonder Woman, you’ve got your hand up?

WONDER WOMAN: Why are we meeting online Spider-man? It’s not like Coronavirus can affect us right?

SPIDER-MAN:          Supergirl, do you want to answer this one. 

SUPERGIRL:            It can. I had it in November. Lost all my strength, couldn’t fly for a month and every time I had a coughing fit my heat-vision went off. Accidentally burnt down three houses. Ended up having to move to one of Batman’s caves.

SPIDER-MAN:          So that’s why. Now, this report. Did you see that they’re developing bridges that can repair themselves?! I mean, that’s an absolute staple for us!  

SUPERGIRL:            Spidey, they’re talking about the odd small crack here and there. Not when it’s been half blown-up by some nefarious super villain!

SPIDER-MAN:          OK, but what about these Nano-bots? Ant-Man was beside himself on the phone yesterday after reading about microscopic machines that could be used to aid operations or delver life-saving drugs. And what can he do? Punch stuff when he’s really small, or call upon an army of insects!

WONDER WOMAN: Well, Ant-Man’s powers have always been a bit, meh?

SUPERGIRL:            I take it you’re not worried then Wonder Woman?

WONDER WOMAN: When the God’s bless you with strength, wisdom, beauty, speed and flight, to name but a few, the fact that some clothing might be able to change shape depending on who’s wearing it, or change colour to react to a person’s mood doesn’t tend to offer too much cause for concern!

SPIDER-MAN:          I suppose so. But, if they are developing electronics that can grow back damaged circuits then it’s only a matter of time before they can work out some of our powers, right?         

WONDER WOMAN: Hasn’t somebody already worked out that your “webs” are technically carbon nanotube rope? Is this why you are so worried?

SPIDER-MAN:          What? No, they’re not. I’m not worried, you’re worried!

SUPERGIRL:            To be fair, the one I’m most interested in is the phone screens that will repair themselves. Especially as I lent my phone to Dr. Banner recently. Didn’t I Bruce!

HULK:                        Ha, ha, ha, Hulk smash!

END


Labels

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Woodbury Scene

I stumbled across a document I submitted a fair few years ago to BBC Radio 4's 'Small Scenes' programme. I remember when I wrote it how I imagined it would sound, and having read it again, I could still hear it clearly in my mind. So, I thought I'd see if I could turn that into reality! I've never done this before, so I'm really pleased with how well it has actually tuned out. Apart from the dodgy acting of course! There are probably a few issues with some parts of the sound, mostly the voices as I recorded them on a microphone in my front room, bu overall I think it sounds okay for my first real effort at this kind of thing. Anyway, enough blather, enjoy! I used Audacity to record the audio (https://www.audacityteam.org/), and to edit it all together. I also used a couple of effects from the BBC's Sound Effects website: http://bbcsfx.acropolis.org.uk/
1 comment
Read more

Phone Scam Sketch

This is a sketch I submitted to Newsjack S24 E4. Apologies as always if the formatting is odd as it is pasted straight from word. Phone scammers asked for £1000 to stop calling Trading Standards has announced that nuisance and scam calls have been on the rise during lockdown - with some people reportedly being stung for thousands of pounds. I had someone call me recently saying my Just Eat account had been hacked as someone had used it every night for a week, I had to explain I just couldn’t be bothered to cook. With so many people being caught out by scammers, could it give others ideas on how they could make some extra money…              FX:                          MEETING ROOM EFFECTS PERSON 1:              OK, as you know Rishi announced some very costly ...
Post a Comment
Read more

I'm sorry, I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue!

One of my favourite comedies of all time is BBC Radio 4's I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue. It is one of the most consistent programmes of any format, and it manages to elicit at least a couple of proper belly laughs from me every episode. Some of the stuff they have 'gotten away with' over the years - particularly anything relating to the mime-master general himself, Lionel Blair, is incredible and testament to the fantastic writers the show has had. The loss of Iain Pattinson earlier this year was a huge blow, as he was an outstanding writer and he will be sorely missed.  I thought it was high-time I shared some of my own, 'Clue-style' efforts, enjoy! Uxbridge English Dictionary definitions Abortion – Avoid Swedish Pop Group Abundant – Damage to sweet roll Accent – Hatchet smell Accident – Hatchet-like mark on car Accidentally – Counting up the number of hatchet-like marks on a car Accommodating – Courting a punctuation mark Accountability – Dracula-li...
Post a Comment
Read more