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Phone Scam Sketch

This is a sketch I submitted to Newsjack S24 E4. Apologies as always if the formatting is odd as it is pasted straight from word.


Phone scammers asked for £1000 to stop calling

Trading Standards has announced that nuisance and scam calls have been on the rise during lockdown - with some people reportedly being stung for thousands of pounds. I had someone call me recently saying my Just Eat account had been hacked as someone had used it every night for a week, I had to explain I just couldn’t be bothered to cook. With so many people being caught out by scammers, could it give others ideas on how they could make some extra money…        

 

FX:                         MEETING ROOM EFFECTS

PERSON 1:             OK, as you know Rishi announced some very costly new measures in the budget and we’ve been tasked with coming up with new ways in which we can bring extra money into the Treasury. I hope that you’ve had time to work with your teams to really think outside the box. So, let’s hear what you have.

PERSON 2:             We could get Amazon or the big tech companies to pay their taxes?

ALL:                        (Laughing)  

PERSON 1:             Yes yes, very good. Now, can we have some real suggestions please?

PERSON 3:             I’ve got something. It’s a bit, out there, but it could just work?

PERSON 1:             Go on, what is it?

PERSON 3:             Well, you know these scam texts and calls you get, pretending to be from HMRC and the like?  

PERSON 1:             What about them?

PERSON 3:             Well, what if we were the ones sending the texts and making the calls?

PERSON 1:             I don’t follow?

PERSON 3:             We send out a bunch of texts and hit the phones telling people they owe money to HMRC. And, if they pay up, bingo! The money goes straight to the treasury!

PERSON 1:             Yes! You see, this is exactly the kind of blue-sky thinking we need. Was this your idea?

PERSON 3:             No, it was actually an external consultant I’ve worked with before. Should I give him a call?

PERSON 1:             Yes, definitely.

FX:                         DIALLING ON MOBILE AND THEN PHONE ANSWERING

PERSON 3:             Dommo! How’s the eyesight? Listen, your idea’s a go. How quickly can you get here?

END

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